Rope bottoms · Friedrichshain, Berlin
I am not going to be anybody's first anything, and I mean it kindly
Pinned as not_anyones_first
- Wants
- somebody with a few years behind them and no need for a guide
- Rope so far
- Ten years, and three attempts at being somebody's introduction to all this.
- Around
- Friedrichshain, Berlin
Three times I have been the person somebody came to this through, and all three times it went the same way. A good six months, then a stretch where they got interested in everything and everyone, then an ending in which I was described, quite accurately, as the person who had opened a door. I do not resent any of them. I simply cannot do it again.
Thirty seven, Friedrichshain, ten years in. This is not about experience levels in general and it is definitely not snobbery about newcomers, who are usually the best company in any room. It is specifically about being the first, which puts you in a position that has nothing to do with who you are.
What I want is somebody who already knows what they like, has been disappointed at least once, and is not going to discover in a year that they want to try everything. That describes about half the people I meet here and none of the ones who write to me.
The rest is ordinary. One person, an evening or two a week, over years.
Not looking for anybody at the beginning of this, however promising. Not looking to be anybody's introduction to a community. And not looking for a partner who wants me to answer questions about what things are called.