Riggers · the west end, Toronto
Sober five years, which turns out to be a logistics problem in this scene
Pinned as i_do_not_drink
- Wants
- somebody for whom a Tuesday evening at home is not a compromise
- Rope so far
- Eleven years, two partnerships, five of those years sober.
- Around
- the west end, Toronto
Sober five years, which comes up here far more than I expected, because almost everything social in this city happens somewhere with a bar in it. That is not a complaint about anybody and I am not asking for accommodations. It is simply that the ordinary route to meeting people involves standing in a room holding something, and I stopped doing that in my thirties.
Thirty eight, the west end, eleven years in. I still go to things occasionally, I leave early, and I have become quite good at not making any of it somebody else's problem. The practical result is that everything I have built in the last five years has come from talking to one person at a time rather than from simply being around.
For a partner that is mostly good news. My evenings are genuinely free, I remember all of them, and I am the one who can drive at eleven at night. What it occasionally means is that I will decline the second half of an evening and go home, and I would not want that read as a comment on anybody else's glass.
What I want is the usual: one person, an evening or two a week, over a long stretch. Somebody content with a lot of time at home, because that is where most of this happens for me and I have stopped pretending otherwise. Whether you drink is entirely your business and has never once been a factor.