I am asked to teach constantly and the answer is going to stay no

Teaching came up again on Saturday, and I said no again, and the person asking was surprised in a way that suggested nobody had ever said no to her before. This happens perhaps twice a month. It is always polite, it is frequently flattering, and it is not what I am here for, so I have decided to say so in writing rather than in person every time.

Thirty three, downtown, twelve years in. The distinction I care about is not snobbery. A partner and a student are two different relationships with two different shapes. In one of them the other person's progress is the whole point and I am watching, assessing and correcting. In the other we are two people spending an evening together and nobody is being evaluated.

I cannot do the first and want the second from the same person. I have tried it twice and both times it went identically. The evening turned into a small examination that she was sitting and I was invigilating, and the affection quietly left the room while we were both being encouraging.

So what I want is somebody who already does this, at whatever level, and has no wish to be brought along. Beginners are excellent company and I have no interest in being anybody's first, which is a separate post and a separate problem.

Not looking for a student. Not looking to be a stage in anybody's education. And not looking to argue about the distinction, which I have now drawn three times in one post.