Riggers · Friedrichshain, Berlin
Ground floor, courtyard windows, and a neighbour who is always in
Pinned as ground_floor_courtyard
- Wants
- somebody willing to solve the where problem jointly rather than leave it to me
- Rope so far
- Seven years, and a flat that has shaped every bit of it.
- Around
- Friedrichshain, Berlin
My windows face a courtyard where you can hear a kettle from three floors up, and the woman below me is retired and at home permanently. Neither of those is a problem I can solve. What they mean is that everything happening in my flat happens quietly and in a fairly narrow band of the day, and that is simply the condition.
Thirty five, Friedrichshain, seven years in. I have found that people either shrug at this or spend six months finding it constraining, and the shrug is a much better predictor of how the whole relationship will go than almost anything else I could ask about.
What I am after is somebody who treats the practicalities as a shared puzzle. Where, when, how loud, whose place, what we do in August when the windows have to be open. Twenty minutes of that conversation early saves an enormous amount later, and almost nobody has it because it is not a romantic way to spend a first evening.
What I want in the long run is a standing partnership with one person. Regular, domestic, no audience.
Not looking for anybody who assumes this will sort itself out. Not looking for a partner who wants to be somewhere with other people, since that is not where I am comfortable. And not looking for something that only works in the summer, which is a real pattern here and one I have been caught by.