Three years of this through a screen, and now I am in the room

Everything I know I learned on a call with somebody in another country, over three years, and I want to be careful about how I describe that. It was real. We were serious about each other and I would defend every hour of it. It was also missing the entire half where two people are physically in a room, and the first time I was in one I found out how much of the subject that half actually is.

Twenty seven, east London. Six weeks ago I did this with a person for the first time and discovered that I had a huge vocabulary, a decent instinct for what somebody needs to hear, and absolutely no idea what to do with my hands or my nerves.

So I am after somebody who will take the useful part of that history seriously and not be surprised by the gaps. I am good at negotiating. I am good at saying what I want in plain words, because when the whole relationship is language you get very good at language. I am bad at the ordinary physical business of standing near a person I like.

I go both ways and I know that reasonably well about myself, though I have only ever done one of them with anybody in the flesh.

Not looking for anybody who thinks three years online counts for nothing, because it counts for a great deal, just not for the part I am short of. Not looking to keep anything remote. And not looking for somebody who wants to move fast on the strength of how articulate I am in writing.