One person for years, which I know reads oddly here

One person, for years. In most places that sentence needs no explanation at all. Here it seems to require a paragraph, because a great deal of what happens in this city runs on being open about everything, and asking for a single long partnership can read as either naive or as a criticism of everybody else.

It is neither. Thirty three, Noord, ten years of rope. I did the version with several people at once, honestly and carefully, and it worked perfectly well for about two years. Then I noticed I was spending my attention in slices and that nothing I had was getting past a certain depth, and I wanted the depth considerably more than I wanted the variety.

That is a preference and not a position. I am not going to be tedious about how anybody else runs their life and I would like the same courtesy in return.

What I am after is two evenings a week with one person, over years, with an ordinary relationship attached to it. Ten years is long enough to know what I am asking for and roughly what it costs, and I am not going to be talked round in month four.

Not looking for a spare evening in an otherwise full week. Not looking to be somebody's second thing, however well organised the calendar is. And not looking to have this agreed provisionally with a view to revisiting it, which has happened twice and on both occasions meant no.