Riggers · outside the ring, Amsterdam
Sober seven years, and the social half of this is mostly drinking
Pinned as sober_seven_years
- Wants
- somebody happy to meet in daylight, doing something with an ending
- Rope so far
- Ten years of rope, seven without a drink, one long partnership.
- Around
- outside the ring, Amsterdam
Seven years without a drink, and the social half of this happens almost entirely with one in everybody's hand. That is not an accusation and I am not making a point about anybody. It is a fact about how people here get to know each other, and it means the ordinary route into knowing anybody is a slightly narrower route for me than for you.
Thirty seven, outside the ring, ten years of rope. I go to things, I stay about two hours, then I go home. People read the leaving as aloofness. It is not. The second half of an evening like that is a different evening and I am simply not in it.
What I have found works instead is daylight and something with a shape to it. Coffee, a walk, an errand somebody actually needs to run. Anything with an ending already built into it. It also means I am reliably the person who remembers the whole of a conversation the following day, which is occasionally useful and occasionally unwelcome.
What I want is a standing partnership, one person, over years. I could not care less whether you drink. The person I was with for nine years did, cheerfully, and it was never once a subject between us.
Dry as this post is, I am better company than it suggests. I am just out of practice at explaining the sober part, which comes up inside the first hour every single time.