Rope bottoms · the south, Amsterdam
I am not a training aid, and I am tired of the phrasing
Pinned as not_to_learn_on
- Wants
- a relationship with rope in it, not an evening with a use for me
- Rope so far
- Five years, and a test I now apply on purpose.
- Around
- the south, Amsterdam
Four people this year have asked me to be their practice, and three of them did not think that was what they were asking. The phrasing varies. Somebody wanting to build up their hours. Somebody who needs to work on something. Somebody who thought I seemed patient. It is the same offer wearing different coats and the answer is the same one.
Twenty seven, the south, five years. I am not squeamish about beginners and I am not precious about experience. I have started from nothing alongside somebody before and would happily do it again. The difference is whether I am a partner in that or a resource in it, and you can hear which it is in the first message, every single time.
The reliable tell is the schedule. A partner asks what my week looks like. A person who wants practice tells me which evening they have free.
What I want is a relationship with rope in it. Specifically, somebody whose interest in me survives a month where we do not tie at all, which is a test I now apply deliberately and which a genuinely surprising number of people fail.
Not looking to be anybody's hours. Not looking for somebody who describes a former partner as good to work on. And not looking to be told I am overthinking this, which is what the fourth one said just before he stopped replying.